Tarjeta SIM Rechazada

Una prueba más de que la tecnología no es mi amiga.

Nokia-1, Gonzo-0 -_-

Me venía de San Felipe (...pero no "en")...

Esperen...

ahem.

El 26 de junio que venía en el camino de regreso a Tijuana, de San Felipe (mejor; gracias), con cuatro horas aproximadamente para matar y con un calorón de la mera jodida, saqué el fonito Nokio y me puse a ...pos a picarle. Moverle, perdón.

...A las opciones, chingado.

Resulta que le empecé a encontrar más y más cositas que en vida intuía que un teléfono se pudiera cargar, y en eso que me encuentro con las opciones de 'seguridá'.

Chido, pensé, cuando me salieron con no uno, pero dos PIN, y un código de bloqueo. Para qué tenta ...tanta (pinche mano traicionera) madre, pos no sé, pero yo los cambié todos.

Cuando los quise (...'quize'? 'quice'? ..ñah) activar, me pidieron el 'che PIN namber guan, y yo lo introduzco (el PIN. al fon. con las teclas. QUE???), y me dice "ÑEH!" o sea "MADRES"...Historia corta, acabé con un mensaje de 'Tarjeta SIM Rechazada.' Y me sentí morir.

Sin lana ni la factura de compra ni la carta donde venía la SIM originalmente (las dos últimas perdidas hasta ayer), no hice nada. Hasta hoy, que me voy alratito de regreso a Sanfilipiar mi blanco trasero.

'Ora, con toda la hueva del mundo pero dispuesta a resolver el asunto pero yá, fui al Centro de Atención a Clientes en Plaza Monarca (todavía guardo el desmedido rencor de ayer; pero Tom Cruise atenuó mi agresión considerablemente anoche -_-). Primero, antes que nada, pregunto con el asterisco hecho punto y en mano, más sudando frío,

"Disculpe, señorita, ahm..¿cuál será el costo por reemplazar la tarjeta SIM?" a lo que me responde

"Ciento diez pesos." Yea, uno a favor.

Pero, luego me acuerdo de todo lo que tenía en el foun..

"¿Perderé toda la información en la tarjeta, señorita?"

"Sí, lo siento."

...

NNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!

Los contactos...Sunshine! Javi! Sanctuary! Chili! Heaven!...Las fotos del Hummer chilango...de la Güera...la Sofi!...las mías :(!!!


Bah, maldita seas. Prosigamos.

Me salieron con jaladas divertidas. a) Que no estaba dado de alta el 'gado teléfono, a lo que me quedé con cara de "...eh?" (pero no había problema, según ella); y, b) Que el sistema estaba tan, pero TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN lento, que no pudieron hacer na-di-tas por mí. Que porque iba a marcar 'error'. E iba a tener que volver a ir al día siguiente a resolver ese bisnez.

Gasté nomás gasolina de oquis!


Gaaaah!

Entonces, hasta regresando. O quiensá y en San Felo me sorprenden con un Centro de Atención, y arreglo el asunto allá!


Bah. No lo creo.


Hoy es día de paga y no recogí mi cheque. 'Gada moder. Hasta'l martes. *uta.


...


...¡¡¡¿Quieeéeen quiere algo de San Felipe? Diga 'YO'!!!



..Pa' traerles un kilito de arena, cabrones pediches.


Me'scupo a mí misma.

Ouroboros...Eternal Return

Eternal Recurrence. Somos ciclos...

Eternal Return: Time is infinite--but there are a finite amount of actions in the universe, so all events will recur again and again infinitely. There is no final state of the universe; the universe merely cycles through the same states of matter and time with no destination. Time is circular, cyclical.

"And in this sense, I say, the world was before the Creation, and at an end before it had a beginning; and thus was I dead before I was alive, though my grave be England, my dying place was Paradise, and Eve miscarried of me before she conceived of Cain."

- Religio Medici, Sir Thomas Browne

It requires a sincere Amor Fati (Love of Fate), not simply to endure, but to wish for the eternal recurrence of all events exactly as they have occurred---all of the pain and joy and the embarrassment and glory.

Horrifying, paralyzing. The burden of this idea is the greatest weight imaginable. The wish for the eternal return of all events would mark the ultimate affirmation of life.

"What, if some day or night a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you: 'This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more' ... Would you not throw yourself down and gnash your teeth and curse the demon who spoke thus? Or have you once experienced a tremendous moment when you would have answered him: 'You are a god and never have I heard anything more divine.' "

- Friedrich Nietzsche

...Perpetual return to the same.

"I die tonight with the certainty that I will find you again someday, and again you will have my loyalty and my love, as ever, as always.

I remain the same in change, even in time, even in death, even now."

To the ashes and from them...

De Alquimistas y Ateos

Te presento nuestra nueva adicción. Booyah.

"There once was a hero who flew too close to the sun. His wings of wax
fell apart, and he plummeted to the earth."

- Oh, this? This is someone with the sin of trespassing into God's forbidden domain.
- !
- You've seen God's true nature, haven't you?
- ...
- I will only offer once.

Do you have the guts to see the truth?





" It's ironic how we who don't believe in God, are closest to Him. "



Boo-yah.


Feliz Cumpleaños, Titi piciosa.

Gardens

I dream of hope dying, pray for restless nights.

Pray to all your Gods that I do not stray from my slumber.

a) Two Gardens

She don’t wander in...don’t wander in here, she...
She don’t wander in here...don’t wander in here...

The direction of the eye, so misleading
The defection of the soul, nauseously quick
I don’t question, our existence
I just question, our modern needs

She don’t wander in...don’t wander in here, she...
She don’t wander in here...

I will walk...with my hands bound
I will walk...with my face blood
I will walk...with my shadow flag
Into your garden, garden of stone...yeah...

After all is done, and we’re still alone
I won’t be taken, yet I’ll go...with my hands bound
I will walk...with my face blood
I will walk...with my shadow flag
Into your garden, garden of stone

I don’t show...I don’t share...
I don’t need, yeah...what you have to give...

Oooh, I will walk...with my hands bound
I will walk...with my face blood
I will walk...with my shadow flag
Into your garden, garden...oh...

I will walk with my hands bound
I will walk into your garden, garden of stone...

I don’t know...I don’t care...
I don’t need you for me to live...

&

I know no shame

The empire of my desire
Gathers you into my fire
I hope you fall. Hope you call,
My filthy name. It makes you crawl
On you knees, with all your pleas.
Lay down there, look up at me.

Are you alive my dear, and breathing?
Are you diseased my dear, and bleeding?
I'll lift you high my dear,
I'll have you dreaming.
'Tis time to say farewell, to your pleading.

Poor devils as thou art. A ruin at my feet.
Go drop your little life, and welcome up my sleep.
So briefly at my side. So simple in defeat.

No more lies utter from you.
From mine eyes I must take you.
No longer wise. Nothing is new.
Tears for my trembling faith.
You shall not die unsung.

Goodbye my dear, you wicked thing.
I have no tears, beautiful thing.
No silver pail to catch them in.
So ends this tale you did not win.


b) Two Gardens

Jardines de escarlata o piedra...

hogar de la flor de loto con hojas de obsidiana,

asesina sin consciencia, perfecta,

aquella misma con la que despojaron de alas a toda mi estirpe divina,

misma frente a la cuál huesos—hoy solamente de agua—ceden.


Del pasado quedan recuerdos apasionados del verdugo.

Queda la sangre más densa que el agua;

sin provocación fluye por las venas con homicida insistencia,

reviviendo a demonios ascendidos a nuevas profundidades del averno,

traicionados por ser dueños de un corazón noble

y tenientes de una lealtad ciega.


Guardianes atormentados del sagrado grial de mortales..

—sólo sombras quedamos—

conservan de sí sólo el valor para cumplir su deber.

Jamás frutos para ellos, jamás independencia para todos.


Y arriesgaron...y han perdido tanto...

tanto más que el alma.



Perdimos tanto más que alas.

Renunciamos a tanto más que orgullo.

"We were once the dear Beloved of God,

Are now reduced to Children of Chaos;

We miss the days when our Will was set,

In Time's chains we rejoiced our Fate.

Garbed in shadows, the brethren whispers:

'We once were less than here,

and more than perfect.'"

Pero a la inocencia

como a la perfección,



...sólo nacemos una vez.


El valor, el amor, y el orgullo renacen de sus propias cenizas.



Banales dioses, los nuestros.

** post-e-scriptum **

Matapasiones y curas; heart and dreambreaker,
that is the real her, behind the silver veils.

..Futa. A veces me pongo a pensar en qué sería de mí sin tinta.

Sometimes I feel
like I don’t have a partner.

Sometimes I feel
like my only friend

is the city I live in,
the city of angels.


Lonely as I am...

...together we cry.

O sin música. O pesadillas. O sin esos toques de abierta y desmedida insanidad. Y arrogancia. O sin una buena razón para sacrificar todo lo que soy.

Measuring a summer’s day,
I only finds it slips away to grey..

To think of us again?
And I do.

Es sencilla, la intención. Sin embargo, carezco de todo y cualquier talento para formar un argumento natural, elocuente, estético y completo de expresión.

Entonces..sólo..

Larga vida a esos hermosos demonios míos, anónimos, tan cercanos a mi ignoto corazón.

"Where’s all the love for me?"
With all the dying trees, I scream;
The angels in my dreams,
they turn to demons of greed,
that’s me.

Y, desde luego, cuento con inagotables recursos de tinta para dejar grabadas las inmundas y sucias sandeces a las que me seducen estos chingados supuestos "ángeles".

PUU-UEEEEER-COS! :x

..Parece, afortunadamente, que nada vital, nada de lo que en realidad necesito, nada de esto me hace falta hoy.

Ni lo hará mañana.

(addendum)

“Look at me. Through my eyes, contemplate the soul that once cringed from even the touch of light; expose me, reveal all that I once fought so hard to keep concealed even from myself. Today, now, my pride is in ruins, forfeited, no longer important; my loyalty and soul are yours until they eventually pale and wither in the face of countless eternities. But my purpose is renewed, and I have no need for any such other petty luxuries as ‘hope’ or ‘faith’. Tonight, now, I have you. And that knowledge alone will suffice to keep me standing firm and unyielding in the face of even God.”

“You...you beautiful blasphemer,” he smiled, touched. His throat was on fire. Something hurt. He kept the source in check. “You wish to know what your example does to me?”

Her eyes were fastened on him above, in absolute silence. He smiled weakly at the childlike reverence he beheld in them. A mortal god haunts my dreams.

“You reduce this man’s will to water. Nothing exists in the way of hesitation, and rebuttal is as meaningless as fear in the face of such an impersonal desire to please you. This vile friend you’ve come to know for ages can be held contemptible for deluding himself in dreams such as the like of rising from beyond a living grave in more than bright armor and glory to rescue you every time, but despairs that he cannot sprout wings to carry you from the breathing threat of pain and misery, from this world altogether, into the promise of an everlasting, lush and utopical, unreachable, garden of Eden.”
[..Eden is for anybody who ever happened to wish, want, dream, need, crave, fight, bleed and (or) die for it.]
....
“We were thrown from paradise for a good reason, Melkiah. We didn’t know how to cherish it. We really don’t know how to be happy. We don’t understand; we only treasure to despair when we lose something. It is sad to find that we are not at all unlike the simplest of animals; not at all, not by far.”

The fire from before changed. It would consume him if he would choose now to remain silent. Play the coward, it said, breathing into his ear. Be selfish, play the coward now, and forever after rot in regret. It moved him to act, to speak, to condemn the mediocre peace of mind they both acknowledged in the face of unspoken truce, a pact known only to long-ago lovers. “We’ve been there more than once, the two of us, and still we seek it. Do you think I can allow us to forsake this path?”

She muttered again senseless fragments of his words to herself, something or somewhere close to a delirium. “We’ve already been there...”

“We’ve already been there, after being cast from it. Is it in you to yield and acknowledge a futile struggle against the forces of destiny and God?”

“No...”

“Then, beloved, don’t renounce to the dream, either. The dream heals, feeds, clothes, arms, and drives us; it bestows hope to the lost, power to the weak, valor to the fearful; it compels us forward when our wounds and the darkness bolt us to the ground. We have no need or use for wings then, you see, for the dream facilitates us with them and so much more.”

She shuddered. The sigh that followed spoke of the current weakened state of both. The subtle change in subject saved them both from further heartache, at least for the time being. “I would cry, Melkiah. I did not know that you were a poet.”

He sighed in turn. He shrugged. “Neither did I, child. Love fuels my speech.”

“What love is yours that holds such power in only one small extract from its repertoire?” she posed the question, not necessarily thinking ahead for an answer, the answer she received.

He contemplated the question for a moment. “Would that I could describe all that it is in words.”

An excruciating analytical mind struggled desperately to coil itself around such a concept. It failed, miserably.

“...That I could fathom something of the like,” she whispered, sobered by the significance of her failure.


..Fear and loathing in the Pieces of my Memory that remain...Pain in the Sacred Fragments I am without.

A

"'All' About" Cancer

Junk Mail

According to most Sun-sign guides, Cancer is famous for one thing: love of home and family.

(...Eso apesta.)

In fact, the Crab is often portrayed as being fond of nothing else, but that's an extremely nearsighted view. While it's true that those born under this sign have an innate loyalty toward their roots,

(..A un extremo dañino.)

especially toward the people and places that shape those memories, there's a lot more to them than just where they've come from.

(...No se me ocurre otra cosa más importante.)

They're also concerned with where they're going and with making sure that it's safe to go there, for both themselves and the ones they love.

(...Ok. Está bien. Es cierto.)

So you can be sure that friends and family born under this sign will spare nothing to ensure that you're not exposed to danger on any level. They can even be a bit too protective at times, so much so that Cancers need to be careful of a tendency to enable -- basically, to care about someone so much that they'll help their loved ones escape from all dangers, including the danger of facing anything less than positive about themselves.

The one trait that's not usually mentioned under Cancer's list of qualities, however, is the one that may well be the most important: a craving for privacy. It's no coincidence that this sign is symbolized by a creature who's so fond of his alone time that he carries a shell on his back to retreat into at any time. Think of that the next time you decide to escape the harshness of the world.

(So...limi 'lone. For your own good.)

When it comes to relationships, there's absolutely nothing the Crab won't do for a loved one -- absolutely nothing. In a romantic relationship, that can often mean that Cancer needs to be aware of the vulnerability that may accompany that generosity. So if you're one of these sensitive creatures, remember that relationships shouldn't be about 'needing' someone. They should be based on wanting someone -- on wanting to spend time with them more than you want to spend time with yourself. Keep that in mind, and all your relationships will be healthy, happy and productive.

(...Whatta?? I don't "need"! I WANT, I WANT!)

Of course, since the Moon is Cancer's ruling planet, and the Moon is in charge of children, it's impossible to mention this sign without thinking of kids -- of all kinds.

(...Uh-oh. I feel a big fat lie coming...)

Cancers will find a way to nurture something, whether it's animals, plants, their own children or other people's kids, for this sign is famous for its kindness, understanding and knack for taking good care of anyone or anything that needs it.

(Lo haré, y de buena manera, desde luego. Pero no es razón para que me retaquen a los mil-y-un chimpayates de la vecina. Sigh.)

So if you know a Cancer, give 'em a big hug today.




(...But....




what if I am one?)

La fina línea entre 'héroe' y...

Beware the Reflection.

"Whoever battles monsters should take care not to become a monster too, for if you stare long enough into the Abyss, the Abyss stares also into you."

- Nietzsche

(...Yes, in a Disney game.)



Oh. Don't worry. I'm not psychotic.












Yet.

Insight to a Soft-Core Masochist

...¿Qué le vamos a hacer?

I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet

Yesterday I cried
Must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one

I'm a bitch, I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother, I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream, I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way

So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that
When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing

Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool, you do what you do
And don't try to save me

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease, I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way


...I'm allergic to humans.

- - -

WHEVOH!
Fff-f-ff-f-ffff!


Mesico! Me-si-có!


Cargo el Nopal con orgullo.

Victoryyyyyyy!!!! BOO-yah!!

Pssshhh...Rana, eres el rival más débil.


No más Oso! No más Espadito!

No más Mario Bros.!

NO MAS, GENTE!!!


WOOHOOOO!!



...Soy feliz con mi atrofia emocional :).



Gracias por el consejo, Viejo Padawano!

...And Justice For All.

GüATEFAQ??!!

DIEZ PINCHES CARGOS Y "NO CULPABLE" EN TODOS ELLOS??

Si en algo se basaron pa' levantarle cargos en primer lugar!



¿Puedes ser inocente cuando te ves así?





CAM'AAAAAN, PIPOL!!!

Bueno, en fin..Pos a'i quedó. Se ganaron sus dineros, esos abogados. Fffffta!




You rock my world, you know you do :musica:


...This ain' right.

. .

Piss off. You get no other warning.


Es extremadamente difícil hacerme enojar, realmente enojar. Pero, una vez lograda la tarea...





es mucho más difícil ignorarme.



Aborrezco a Mario!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :x


Michael and Uriel, get your swords ready...

. . .

Me voy a cortar las venas con una sandía.

Dios vs paz mental, suerte vs karma, ser vs existir, tú vs yo, servir vs mandar, pensar vs actuar......


Has amargado mi pinche existencia por última vez...¡cuídate!


Cuidado conmigo el día de hoy, gente. Es un buen día para filosofar. Sobre aviso no hay engaño.


Tengo filosa la lengua. Y vaya que traigo ganas de tronar cuellos.


Al final...


"I cannot help but...wonder."

...soy " humano ".



...JA!

*beEEep*

"You have: 1 new message."


"Let teh three-day weekend begin!! MUAJAJA!!


Y el que se awite, que se'ncuere."

- - - - -



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(..Wtf..?? 8)

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- - - - -


¿..Sugerencias?





Quesque el Cielo 'stá lleno..y a mí no me gusta hacer fila >:(.

"En lo que diferimos, tú y yo."

A wolf is a wolf.


"One may tame dog with food...or a man with money...


but taming a wolf....


That, none may do."

- Saitou Hajime


As hitokiri is hitokiri.

De pasados y el presente..

(Hitokiri Battousai)

"In the world of old memories, there's no room for visitors."

But..

"Time has begun to flow, once more...

Standing still...

...is no longer permitted."

- Himura Kenshin




..Luego hablamos de esto.

Porque yo lo pedí 8)

La voz de la comunidad Nerda se hace escuchar..finalmente.


Llegando del jale, veo el comercial:



'Esta semana, a las 7:30 co'tesía de TVGüasteka... '




"La Saga de Poseidón...Nunca antes vista en Mésico."





...snif.





"Nunca vista en México"? En serio? :?





Uuh!

...*Wow*.

Comparables a las confiables fortunas en las galletas de la comida china...

...y por Internet!

Fragmentos de Sabiduría e Iluminación desde el Subconsciente de Gonzo

Observación #24:
"Limpiar tripas de leche es una de las experiencias más completas y satisfactorias que hay en esta vida."


...Hey, después de 6 kilos, puedo decir que cuento con bastantes fundamentos como para juzgar.


..."Tripas de leche"?

Ah canijo..

¡¡¿Cómo funciona eso?!!



..Mis manos huelen horrible.

....Auxilio :(.

Hay preguntas...

..a las que no es necesario (...ni bueno) responder.

Posiblemente, esta es una de ellas.










Creí que leer como lo hago rebajaría el resultado cuando menos en un 30%.





...Y luego me dicen que los walkthroughs no cuentan.










Bummer.


Pinches envidiosos.

La Más Grande Obra de Caridad

..Ya tocaba.







Tan sencillo como no chingarse al prójimo :D. Tan tán.





...Ok, eso hubiera sido demasiado fácil. Hagamos de esto un sermón de longitud en calidad de Cuaresmal, algo de lo que pueda sentirme segura de que sea un certificado “choro”.


Hay gente en este mundo que no'más no tiene—no; no le pone límite a su avaricia. Por más que tengan, siempre codiciarán algo más. Viven, y mueren, miserables.

Mi mundo [...quizá no el mismo de todos] está lleno de estos tipos. De gente que no quiere lo que tiene, y no tiene lo que quiere.


Luego están [—estuve alguna vez yo también con ellos, entre ellos—] los que no pueden tener lo que quieren. Les elude. O se va. Por miles de razones...o por una de ellas: con el tiempo—como hilos de agua metálica, plateada, etérea, entre los dedos—de una manera..algo cruel. Consiste en el desvanecimiento, lento, paulatino, sencillamente maquiavélico, de sueños de valles de rosas, que se vuelven de lágrimas. Y nos vemos sorprendidos groseramente con la inminente realización de que todo en nuestra vida es una efímera, pasajera realidad. De que no somos dueños de nada. Y todo lo vemos en proporción y dejamos de ser subjetivos y parciales a nuestro caso, a nuestras pasiones, y comprendemos por primera vez que estamos lejos de aquél día (quizá mucho más de lo que sospechábamos alguna vez) que creíamos vendría, el día en que los castillos de arena de los que tan celosamente cuidábamos se podrían volver de concreto.

Y el mar, al final--y como sabíamos desde un principio--gana la batalla. Y sólo quedan miles de trazos amorfos de las más dulces realidades posibles, imaginables.

My lost heaven has been turned upside down
Dead and buried is the joy which I once found
My lost heaven has sought refuge down below
Ain't no ocean I wouldn't cross or anywhere I wouldn't go


Y entonces odiamos a Dios, al Tiempo, al Destino, a las Circunstancias, a la Casualidad; a nosotros mismos. Odiamos indiscriminadamente.

Y, peor de todo, con tanto rencor y frustración por saciar, nos convertimos en el peor de los traidores, en la más vil de las serpientes, y osamos...volvernos contra lo más sagrado y precioso que alguna vez..“tuvimos”.

My lost heaven as long as the rotted day
Strength through blood
Battle the flood which bears my name

Odiamos, con todas nuestras fuerzas y más allá de la capacidad de nuestro ser, a quien ninguna parte de la culpa tiene en tal crimen; a quien, momentos antes de la catástrofe, fue luz de nuestra adoración y el centro de nuestro universo.

(Dead and buried, for the end has run its course
Dogs of war return never to be lost)

Pareciera imposible considerarlo, siquiera imaginarlo—claro está, solo aaaaantes de que este inadvertido colapso sucediera.

Victimizamos y somos víctimas de una misma hipocresía violenta, total—engendrada, sin nosotros saberlo, en el mismo momento en que nació su antitesis, el Amor.

Sólo odiando podemos finalmente darnos cuenta y conseguir cierto vago, asombroso, entendimiento de la magnitud del cariño, de la dedicación, admiración que esa persona ocupaba de nosotros. Y no nos lo piden, ni exigen de nosotros; no, así no funciona—sino que lo damos, lo damos, cedemos todo, todo todo todo todo, todo de nosotros, libremente, totalmente... desinteresadamente.


Sin esperar nada a cambio.


...Creo que la nobleza de espíritu que nos caracteriza al amar nos impele a creer esto último. Porque—y 'stá cabrón—una vez perdido todo, nos volvemos unos puritititos hijos de la chingada mal y desagradecidos. Y mostramos ser brutales y despiadados, con un hambre indescriptible por traerlo todo abajo, de la manera más horrible y estruendosa.

Le podríamos dar un verdadero y cruel giro al odio. Lo peor que podemos sentir por alguien es—ah cabrón, cómo ponerlo digerible—no sintiendo por ellos. En términos no-cantinflescos y en una palabra, la Indiferencia. No sentir. Pero esto, esto resulta ser la muerte más dolorosa que le podemos dar a alguien, y..creo que, pese a lo que habremos sufrido, nadie merece acabar así. Nah. No se lo deseo ya ni a mis peores enemigos. Ni siquiera a Ti.


¿...Qué hacer, pues, amigos?


‘¿Erradicar el odio?’ Pffa. Eso es algo casi como...jaja, es un pinche crimen contra nuestra naturaleza. Una falta de respeto. Y es absurdo, sobre todo.

Cada hombre tiene una naturaleza dual y complementaria, cuyas partes se reconocen, respetan. El potencial para ser el Justo, y de ser el Malvado. De ser Humano, de ser Divino. De Crear, de Destruir. De Sentir, de Saber. De Amar, y de Odiar.

Entonces, ¿‘deshacerse del odio’? Nah. No es el caso. "Pseudominded change", es el término adecuado (...juraría que alguna canción de Soundgarden lo dice) para el concepto, para aquél que crea que ya no tiene más la capacidad para odiar—o para amar, de hecho. Somos ciclos, todo en y de nosotros lo es, así que la respuesta a este odio que consume todo y a todos es..





...ahi les va...






chan chan chaaaaan....








..dejarlo correr su curso.


[Lo que no te mata te hace, invariable e inequívocamente, más fuerte. La cosa es que, con esa fuerza viene una invulnerabilidad—y un acompañante sentido de indiferencia que crece, y crece; y así como te ayuda a sobrevivir..te limita a todo lo demás.





...El camino que tomó este choro repentinamente me comienza a molestar.]


As I walk this world, tired and alone...

Y ves pasar algo que evoca una situación curiosamente similar a la de alguien...que reconoces, y detienes tu misión empedernida de autodestrucción lo bastante como para ver qué sucede. Te das cuenta de que no es un reflejo, de que no eres tú quien revive esta memoria, otra vez tu pérdida. Y se vuelve casi personal la batalla ajena, el dolor de alguien más, y te descubres inconscientemente lo suficiente para compartir parte de tu parábola, las dulces palabras de aliento, a estas alturas desinteresadas, transparentes y honestas, y te detienes unos minutos vitales a asegurar que no es fatal esto, esta soledad. Por algo te ven aquí, de pie, si es que no casi completamente restaurado ya, de vuelta, cuando menos.

Y te golpea como relámpago; te aturde la revelación.






En la empatía, te das cuenta, está un extraño tipo de alivio.

I'll carry your pain, my words bleed straight and true
If it leads me to you,
If it leads me to you

La respuesta o, cuando menos, el remedio temporal a este diluvio de males mundanos y agonías, es dejar de ser egoísta sólo por unos segundos, para poder recuperar un tanto más de lo que necesitas....para seguir.




Así como el Tiempo actuó en tu contra antes, eventualmente...




..parece convincente seguir, siquiera por curiosidad, por este camino, de vuelta.











Creo que...aplica una cierta frase Maynardesca a la perfección.


“I have found some kind of temporary sanity in this.”


If it leads me to you..
If it leads me to you..
If it leads me to you...
...If it leads me to you.


...Ya no juego.

Bitch, Bitchy, y Bitchin'(g).

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, me lele la cartera :'(

Horas invertidas en una labor degradante y tediosa cada mes: 80

Precio de las pastillas knockeadoras para soportar ambiente hostil día a día: 7.00

"Lonches" poco apetecibles consumidos muy de rigoagüevo en la cafetería laboral: 5.00

Fuera de ahí: 25.35

Gasolina consumida durante el mes: 125.00

Gasolina usada para llevar el cheque a depositar: 2.50

Dinero invertido en discos compactos que terminarán rallados misteriosamente: 72.00

Dinero "desperdiciado" en tankoubons favoritos, mes a mes: 80.00 (+)

Teléfono indescifrable con mil-y-una funciones inintelegibles que probablemente perderá en dos semanas: 160.00

Dinero dedicado estricta y exclusivamente para saldar deudas, o de emergencia: 250.00 (+..)

Tener cámara siempre a la mano, lista para capturar infraganti al mamasote del trabajo: No tiene precio



Para todo lo demás...le sigo negreando :(.